Internet Service Providers To Start Policing Your “Illegal” Online Activity

ISPs are now recruiting for their new Internet Police Academy. Sign up today! (Credit: WARNER BROS. 1984)

NEW YORK (TRP) – Did you feel that? Of course you didn’t, because your internet service provider failed to send out that notice announcing that starting JULY 12 it began tattle-telling on all your suspicious activity. Ah, don’t we hate tattle-tellers.

In an effort to crackdown on illegal file-sharing, ISPs like Cablevision, Verizon, Comcast and Time Warner Cable quietly rolled out new security programs on JULY 12 that will police the activity of their own customers, zeroing in on copyright infringement.

The system will reportedly function as an automated “educational” alert system where if “illegal” or “questionable” activity is detected, a subscriber will receive a notification from their ISP alerting them that they’ve been busted.

The notice – which should really be called the “oh no you didn’t” alert – will educate scold the customer about their sinful act. Repeat offenders who rack up these notices will ultimately be penalized with “bandwidth throttling” and even possible service suspension.

While we would never encourage illegally downloading copyrighted material, subscribing to a service on the terms it will function as a mere “provider” and later it’s revealed that your activity will be policed is not only misleading, but perpetuates a dubious disposition for a business model.

And not to mention, it also opens the door to a George Orwell-type scenario. Fun!

So kids, spread the word: Our rights are getting violated yet again.

With service fees continuing to rise and now with the launch of a police program, customers have yet another reason to cancel their internet service and set up shop at a local Starbucks.